|EPISODE 418: THE MONSTER AT THE END OF THIS BOOK
Dean Winchester: I'm sitting in a Laundromat, reading about myself... sitting in a Laundromat reading about myself. My head hurts.
|Dean: (reading on the computer) There are 'Sam girls' and 'Dean girls' and... what's a slash fan?
Sam: As in Sam-slash-Dean... together.
Dean: Like together together?
Dean: (horrified) They do know we're brothers, right?
Sam: Doesn't seem to matter.
Dean: Oh, come on, that... that's just sick!
|Chuck Shurley: I'm the prophet Chuck!
Lilith: You've got to be joking.
|Dean: (reading a Supernatural book) This is freakin' insane. How does this guy know all this stuff?
Sam: You got me.
Dean: Everything is in here, I mean everything, from the racist truck to me having sex. I'm full frontal in here, dude.
|Sam: Well, we're hoping that our article can... shine a light on an underappreciated series.
Sera: Yeah! Yeah, because, you know, if we got a little bit of good press, then maybe we could start publishing again!
Dean: No, no, no, no. God no. I mean, why, why would you want to do that? You know, it's uh... such a complete series. What with Dean going to Hell and all.
Sera: Oh my God, that was one of my favorite ones because Dean was so... strong and sad and brave. And Sam... oh, I mean the best parts are when they cry, you know, like in... like in "Heart." When Sam had to kill Madison, the first woman since Jessica he really loved. And in "Home," when Dean had to call John and ask him for help. If only real men were so open and in touch with their feelings.
Dean: Real men?
Sera: Oh... I mean, no offense. How often do you cry like that, hmm?
Dean: Well, right now I'm crying on the inside.
Sera: Is that supposed to be funny?
Dean: Lady, this whole thing is funny.
|Chuck: Look, uh, I appreciate your enthusiasm. Really, I do. It's always nice to hear from a fan. But for your own good I strongly suggest you get a life.|
|Dean: (reading) "Sam turned his back on Dean. His face brooding and pensive." I mean, I don't know how this guy is doing it but this guy is doing it. I can't see your face but those are definitely your pensive and brooding shoulders. (Sam pauses) You just thought I was a dick.
Sam: This guy's good.
|Dean: It frustrates me when you say such reckless things.
Sam: Well, it frustrates me when you'd rather hide than fight.
|Dean: Behave yourself, would you? No homework. Watch some porn.|
|Zachariah: Where are you going?
Chuck: To go kill myself.
Zachariah: Don't be melodramatic, Chuck. We'd only bring you back to life.
|Castiel: Dean, let him go! This man is to be protected.
Castiel: He’s a prophet of the Lord.
|Dean: (about Chuck being a prophet) Him? Really?
Castiel: You should've seen Luke.
|Chuck: You - you’re Castiel. Aren’t you?
Castiel: It’s an honor to meet you, Chuck. I admire your work.
Dean: Whoa whoa whoa. What, this guy, a prophet? Come on! He’s practically a penthouse forum writer! (to Chuck) Did you know about this?
Chuck: I uh - I might have dreamed about it.
Dean: And you didn’t tell us?
Chuck: It was too preposterous. Not to mention arrogant! I mean, writing yourself into the story is one thing, but as a prophet? That’s like M. Night level douchiness.
|Castiel: You must understand why I can't intercede. Prophets are very special, they're protected.
Dean: I get that.
Castiel: If anything threatens a prophet, anything at all, an archangel will appear to destroy that threat. Archangels are fierce, they're absolute, they're heaven's most terrifying weapon.
Dean: And these archangels, they're tied to prophets?
Dean: So if a prophet was in the same room as a demon...?
Castiel: Then the most fearsome wrath of heaven would rain down on that demon.
(gives a knowing look)
Castiel: Just so you understand why I can't help.
Dean: Thanks, Cas.
Castiel: Good luck.
|Dean: Okay, well then how 'bout this? I've got a gun in my pocket, and if you don't come with me, I'll blow your brains out.
Chuck: I thought you said I was protected by an archangel?
Dean: Huh, interesting exercise. Let's see who the quicker draw is.
|Comic Book Guy: I Knew It! Your guys are larping, aren't you?
Dean: Excuse me?
Comic Book Guy: Your fans.
Sam: Fans of what?
Dean: Wat is larping?
Comic Book Guy: Like you don't know?!
(Blank looks from Sam and Dean)
Comic Book Guy: Live Action Role Playing. And pretty hard core to.
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