|EPISODE 604: WEEKEND AT BOBBY'S
|Crowley: Been making merry have we?
Bobby: Bite me.
Crowley: If that's your thing.
|Crowley: Cheer up mate. We just saved the sodding world together. Me, I'm celebrating.
Bobby: I'd hate to see what you call celebrating.
Crowley: Yes you would.
|Bobby: Let me get this straight. We just saved the sodding world together and you're too good to drink with me?
|Crowley: Balls in your court, Robert. Ten years of living or ten years as Alpo.|
|Dean: What happened? You fallen and can't get up?
|Demon(to Bobby): Hey there cranky. You were gone so long I just assumed alcoholic coma.|
|Demon: You don't get it. He's the king.
Bobby: King of the crossroads. I've heard the speech.
Demon: No, king of hell.
|Marcy: Hey, have you seen drag me to hell?
Bobby: I've been trying to avoid it.
Marcy: But it's fantastic!
|Demon: Aww, she sounds nice. Are you gonna make sweet love to her before you stab her to death ,Bobby? That is your usual thing right?|
|Rufus (to Bobby): Oh good, you're home! You gotta help me bury a body!|
|Bobby: Why'd you bring it here?
Rufus: The law is on my tail. What was your guess?
Bobby gives a sarcastic look.
Rufus: What what what? They got lucky!
Bobby: Yeah, or you're getting slow.
Rufus: Or I'm gettin...yeah yeah yeah says Mr. Sits on his ass all day taking calls.
|Rufus: What am I a heathen? I know what Craig is.|
|Sheriff: Okay fella's put away the rulers and zip up.|
|Bobby: Why did you send him outside?
Sheriff: Cause I didn't think you'd want him in here!
Bobby: I don't! I've got a body in the basement.
Sheriff: My point.
Bobby: But I've got another body buried in the yard.
Sheriff: Damnit! *goes to look out the door* He's not there!
|Bobby: The Okami aint' dead!
Rufus: Course it is.
Bobby: Did you use a bamboo dagger?
Bobby: Blessed by a Shinto Priest?
Rufus: I'm not an imbecile Bobby.
Bobby: Did ya stab it seven times?
Rufus: Five times.
Bobby: It's seven!
Rufus: I'm pretty sure it's five!
Bobby: Clearly it's seven times. The damn hole is empty!!
|Marcy: I'm trying to keep my cool, Bobby but what are you doing in my house with a shotgun?
Bobby: Have you seen anything...weird?
Marcy: You mean besides you?
|Bobby: I uh thought your chipper was broke?
Marcy: I just said that to get you over here.
Bobby: Oh...well I guess I could come over for dinner some night. Might be fun.
Marcy: I don't think so.
Bobby: Story of my life.
|Rufus: You're still alive huh?
Bobby: Don't act so surprised.
|Rufus: So you just happen to have a bamboo dagger blessed by a Shinto Priest laying around?
Bobby: Wood chipper.
Rufus: Oh, okie dokie. Wood chipper. That pretty much trumps....everything.
|Bobby: Sam, Dean, I love you like my own. I do. But sometimes *pause for drink* Sometimes you two are the whiniest, most self absorbed sons of b*tches I ever met! I'm selfish! Me! I do everything for you! Everything! You need some lore scrounged up, you need your ass blown out of the fire, you need someone to ***** to about each other. You call me and I come through, every time damn time! And what do I get for it? Jack with a side of squat!
Bobby: Do I sound like I'm done! Now look. I know you've got issues. God knows, I know, but I got a news flash for you. You ain't the center of the universe! Now it may have slipped your mind that Crowley owns my soul and the meter is running! Now I will be damned if I'm going to sit around and be...and be damned! So how about you two sack up and help me for once!
Sam: Bobby...all you gotta do is ask.
Dean: Anything you need, we're there.
|Sheriff: Do you have any idea what it takes to extradite a prisoner? I'd need a court order, permission from the D.A...I'd have to call in every marker I got and hand out a few to boot.
Bobby: So you're saying there's a chance?
|Bobby: You look like hammered crap.
Crowley: And you're a vision as always. (notices the devils trap) Don't we both know how this games ends? Really Bobby, you gotta know when to fold em.
|Crowley: You know what the problem with demons is?
Bobby: They're demons.
|Bobby: Do I look like Dr. Phil to you?
Crowley: A little.
|Bobby: I know it all now. Fergus. You may be king of the dirtbags here, but in life you were nothing but a two bit tailor who exchanged his soul...in exchange for an extra three inches below the belt.
Crowley: Just trying to hit doubly digits.
|Dean: Did you really used to wear a skirt?
Crowley: A kilt. I had very athletic calves.
|Bobby: You demons. You think you're something special, but you're just spirits. Twisted, perverted, evil spirits, but the end of the day...you're nothing but ghosts with an ego. We torch your bones, you go up in flames.
Dean: You hear that Crowley. That's me flicking my bic for you.
Bobby: Your bones for my soul. Going once. Going twice...
|Dean: Now that I think about it, maybe I'll just napalm your ass anyhow.
Sam: Dean, he's a dick, but a deal's a deal.
Crowley: I don't need you to fight my battles for me, Moose. Get bent.
|Dean: Anytime we get to punk Crowley works for us.
Bobby: Still knowing how much you love flyin' the friendly skies, I guess a nine hour plane trip was no picnic. What'd you do drink your way through it?
Dean: I was fine.
Sam: Nah he white knuckled his way through four puke bags.
Dean: At least I was sober! If some nut job decided to try something I was ready. I had a fork!
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